| In Brief |
Rev Paisley
demands all Sein Fein members submit to anal inspections
Formula 1 secures new sponsorship from Marlo Bro. Cigro Hats
Chutney on telescope blamed for mistaken 10th
planet claim
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| Entertainments |
James Blunt: 'My beautiful chart
success has been beautiful'
Hollywood writer shortage leads to 98% of new movies
being remakes
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Lord
Coe to Pimp London Prostitutes for Olympic 'Construction Revenue'
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Lord
Coe shows off one of the new IOC official prostitutes
that will generate huge revenues
for the city
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London 2012 committee chairman, Lord
Sebastian Coe, today announced plans to generate more "construction
revenue" by maximising the cities under-utilised street
walkers.
The announcement comes on the back of the
committees highly lucrative lottery racket which has generated
several million pounds for the London Olympic Commitee.
Olympics Minister Tessa Jowell said the Olympic
brothels were being set up now to allow enough time for the
committee to raise the money needed for the extensive construction. Full
Story >> |
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Suicide
pigeon shot dead outside busy shopping centre
 A
new terror alert has been issued across the country after an overweight
pigeon stuffed with explosives was shot and killed outside a Birmingham
shopping centre.
People have been told to keep an eye open for particularly fat birds especially
those that appear to be nervous and struggling to fly.
Full Story >>
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Local Reverend
Arrested in Illegal Mushroom Trafficing
 A
local town Reverend has been charged with drug offences
following a police sting
operation in Hampshire.
Teams of officers arrested Reverend
John Willows, 67 of Andover, whilst he was trekking across
a popular family walking area in the Cotswald Hills on
Sunday morning.
Full Story >> |
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