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Lord
Coe shows off one of the new IOC official
prostitutes that will help generate revenues for
the city
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London 2012 committee chairman,
Lord Sebastian Coe, today announced plans to generate
more "construction revenue" by maximising the cities under-utilised
street
walkers.
The announcement comes on the back of the
committees highly lucrative lottery racket which has generated
several million
pounds for
the London Olympic Commitee.
Olympics Minister Tessa Jowell said the Olympic
brothels were being set up now to allow enough time for the
committee to raise
the money needed for the extensive construction.
"These will be sexy Games and Games
for everyone. We are set for a very
horny seven years indeed," she said.
The Games are expected to cost a total of £2.375bn
and Sebastian Coe believes this new venture will be vitally important
for the fund-raising effort.
"With the money we have already collected
from the scratch cards, we will have enough to begin construction
of the major sites, and once we get the workers and the bitches
setup we can just keep recycling those wages Mutha Fucka",
explained Lord Coe.
"We are going to be offering all London
hookers a better percentage than they are getting from their
existing
pimps and we will accommodate and feed them to council standards",
The Lord added.
The LOC plan to take control of large proportions
of London's prostitutes and set them up with positions in or near
the main construction areas. The massive influx of construction
workers into the city will provide plenty of business for the
official IOC Ho's.
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Olympics Minister Tessa Jowell
shows her backing
for the cause by dressing up like a real pro.
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It is expected that many of the cities top pimps will be quickly
uninstalled from their positions and their women moved to the
new locations as and when the LOC see fit.
Local Mac-Daddy Sweet Brown has been outraged
by the new plans which are likely to all but destroy his
own business. "If that plum faced cracker Coe comes
round here and tries to mess with my bitches he's gonna find
out
just how bitter a nigger like Sweet Brown can be."
The LOC have insisted that any loss of business
for local pimps will be reasonably compensated but have insisted
that all of London and the UK should get behind the plans for
the city and for the esteem and notoriety of Lord Coe.
"It
is important that we start peddling this ass now in order
that we build up the income stream
that will be
able
to fund
the development of the new sporting infrastructure, the quality
of my ride and the venues that will host the Games in seven
years' time",
insisted Da Lord. |