Happy workers look on as new President Jiabao Wen accepts control of the country from citizen Blair

The deal, which cost the Chinese Republic an estimated £300 trillion will see much of their low end disposable goods production moved to the Isle. The UK, or the Western Chinese Province (WCP), as it is now known will soon see a 100% reduction in crime, homelesness and rock music.

As of Monday, 9 am every citizen of the Western Chinese Province will be allocated a new prosperous work opportunity to help build the glory of the Republic.

The country has been divided into key production areas and each will specialise in those products specifically. The area, which was previously known as Scotland will cease all traditional industry and will begin production of generic, self-assembly furniture in factories throughout the area.

Much of the north of the province is set to become the key international centre for production of low grade plastic novelty goods, whereas the south will be more concerned with administration and animal products.

The decision to buy the UK comes on the back of a growing demand for cheaply produced Chinese goods across the world. Since 98% of Chinese farmland has already been used to house cheap low grade factories it has become essential that China moves some of its production abroad so as to maintain some farming capabilities.

Proposed division of labour across the province

It was felt that the UK showed excellent potential for this growth due to its peoples willingness to both work long hours and to stand in long queues indefinitely.

With the UK's approximate current workforce in the region of 30 million from a population of 60 million the new regime aims to get at least 50% of the idle population back in the factories immediately.

There will be tremendous incentive for many of the very young and very old to get to back to work as anyone not working when able will be shot and buried in an unmarked grave.

However, only children over the age of 14 will be expected to work the minimum 60 hour week - those under 14 will remain in their current realignment centre until fit to join the glorious workforce

Though there is some concern in the province that certain jobs may be lost in favour of less fulfilling employment, Prime Minister Wen insists these ideas will soon be crushed.